Circle of Appreciation

Anatomy lab was bitter sweet.  I am pretty excited for it to be over in a few weeks but in a small way, I will miss it.  The bonding that takes place between lab mates is very unique.  A balance between curiosity and total disgust exists during many of the labs.  Some students dive right in and love dissecting while others sit back and watch.  I proudly fall into the second group.  Everyone in our group was very respectful and courteous of each other's needs.  When someone needed a break, somebody would step up and take over.  Everyone was included in one way or another.  

It isn't natural to dissect a cadaver.  When the inner voice in your head says stop, you have to find a reason to keep going.  We rationalize the situation by focusing on learning the structures we must uncover.  You cannot think about the person under the knife.  At times, I find myself wondering what he was like.  Was he a good person?  Did he have a family?  Was there a memorial service for him?  What did he do for a living?  Was he rich?  Poor?  Was he active and fit?  What were his hobbies?  These questions will never be answered.  The only answers we can get are from what we find under the skin.  It is then you find a detailed history of medical procedures, abnormalities, and unique structures only your cadaver has.  From this information you can understand a small portion of his life - particularly the pain he endured.  All the happy, pain free days of his life will never be known.  Our understanding of this person is quite simple and objective.  During lab, we had to identify with him beyond his dead body.  So, we assigned him a name, Herbert.  Why did we do this?  

I would suggest this is the only way we could move forward - by assigning a name to him, we allowed ourselves to think he was okay with us dissecting him.  A right of passage, perhaps.  At times we spoke directly to him, jokingly, by telling him what we were going to do to him during that day.  We even tucked him in to bed when we put him away for the day.  It is human nature to be caring and thoughtful to other's needs.  We felt compelled to treat him respectfully but still get the job done.  In the end, he will be cremated.  We will never know where his ashes end up or whether he will have a ceremony on his behalf.  At the end of the quarter we will have a ceremony of sorts - a circle of appreciation.  It is quite a sacrifice to donate your body to science.  Not knowing his reasons for choosing to do this is difficult to comprehend.  All we can do is honor his wishes and proceed with our weekly dissections.  When we wrap up the quarter with our final lab exam, we will tuck him in one last time and send him away to his final resting place.  

I will always remember him as the gentle faced man awaiting our eager minds.  He taught us many things that will empower us to help many, many people.  It is our duty to remember the sacrifice he made to teach us the details of  the human body.  His choice to help us in our education should never be forgotten as God was with him when he made it.  

Thank you Herbert