Too Much Time to Think!

As the break gets going, I find myself sitting in the quiet stillness of my living room, strumming the guitar and wondering why I am thinking about neurophysiology and gram negative bacteria. The thoughts jump from one to the next without any interruption and I ask myself, without speaking of course, how can this be normal? How can I go from thinking about the amygdala to an antibiotic, vancomycin, and act as if these are normal thoughts? It is funny to sit in silence after all the mental obstacles that had to be managed in the past weeks. I can't say that these quiet days are really that quiet.

Even though it is hard to find new things to do to occupy my time, I am enjoying the down time. There is a feeling that something is always due and if I sit too long I am not being productive enough... On and on it goes. Hopefully, by the end of next week or this week perhaps I will be cured of my mental woes and life will return to a "normal" state.

I wonder if normal can ever be achieved again after all that has been absorbed from our classes? Going through a program like this where every thought is racing through your mind and anxious chemicals cause symptoms such as sweating, shortness of breath and increased heart rate is taxing. We mustn't take the stress for granted. There is a definite reason we should keep going through this torture but if we don't unwind and return to a dose of nothingness, we'll be victims of heart attacks or mental disorders (like me...).

Since I have nothing to do I am going to visit a few clinics in town this week and keep an eye on how they've set their clinics up - treatment rooms, reception, personal office space etc. The more I can see now the easier it will be to set up my own clinic in about two years from now.

I am also going to visit the naturopathic school and sit in on some of their classes as well as spend some time at some of their clinics. I have this aching desire to check it out to make sure it isn't my calling. Now is the time to figure this stuff out and even though I'd love to sit back and sip brews all break, I know there is much to do. I will drink brew but there are some things I need to finalize prior to starting 2010. Regardless, I am here at WSCC for the next term through quarter 5. I figure with the experience at NCNM and their clinic system, and having 5 quarters of DC school under my belt, I will know which is right for me.

All for now